Sunday, December 27, 2009

Helping Kids Understand the Heart - Tedd Tripp

Tim and I watched the second video in the Tedd Tripp Biblical Parenting Conference at Mars Hill.
The second video was on "Helping Kids Understand the Heart"

I mentioned this in my last post but one of the major lessons I walked away with from Tedd Tripp's book "Shepherding a Child's Heart" is that disciplining our children biblically is about dealing with issues of our heart, and not just focusing on creating "good" behavior. That was the focus of this session - and I was just as convicted this time as I was the first time!

Here are some of the primary notes that I took away from the videos:

~ The Bible mentions the heart in 762 verses - according to the Bible the heart is the wellspring of life, (Proverbs 4:23) it is the part of us that we "live out of" - the Bible also tells us that it is our heart that the Lord looks at (1 Samuel 16:7)
~ Jesus does not draw the line at external behavior He points to the importance of the heart our behavior is an overflow of the heart. (Mark 7:17-23, Matthew 15:17-20) 

~ What we see in behavior is a reflection of the heart, to parent biblically we must address the heart (Luke 6:43-45 good fruit = good tree)

~ As parents there are endless ways that we can manipulate our children into good behavior: shame, bribes, fear, threats, etc. the problem when we do this however is the (1) the real need (a change of heart) is not being addressed (2) we are creating a false basis for ethics (3) the heart is being wrongly trained (4) the gospel/grace will never be central (5) and it also exposes the idols of our hears - control, pride, ease, convenience, fear of man, etc

~ The truth is, we (our children included) need a cleansing, our idols removed, a heart transplant and empowerment
~ Ezekiel 36:25-27 "... you shall be clean from all your uncleanness, and from all your idols I will cleanse you. I will give you a new hear, and a new spirit I will put within you. And I will remove the hear of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh. And I will put my Spirit within you, and cause you to walk in my statues and be careful to obey my rules." 
~ If you accept superficial behavior you raise pharisees, hypocrites, self-righteous children
~ The more we deal with the heart the more we show we NEED grace, it also teaches openness and realness with their parents

~ Galatians 6:1 "If anyone is caught in any transgression you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentless. Heep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted."
* We are called to restore our children gently - kids are easily "trapable" - being caught in a trespass a parents job is to restore which means to tear back to what is solid, stable and good and build from there. It is certainly gentle work.
* At the same time we need to show humility - we sin in the same way as our children, understand them and grow with them.

1 comment:

Michelle said...

We must have just posted something at the same time! When I came back from posting this was here!

I just recently read a blog post from an older mom about teaching our children about sinful behavior and teaching them that they are sinning. It's pertinent that as parents we understand the "heart issue." That being we have a rotten heart that needs replaced!

Good post. It would be interesting to know how "heart" used in scripture is also = to "understanding."