This morning during my quiet time I was really encouraged by 2 Corinthians 12:9-10 which says:
I am weak. Really weak. Weak in many areas, really. And for the sake of your sanity, I won't bore you with the details of it all, but I even struggle with the idea of being weak.
I don't want to be weak.
I want to be able to do everything on my own.
In my time.
Any time, all the time.
I'm a finisher. I'm a type-a personality. I love getting things done. I am goal-oriented. My mood is usually an indication of how much (or little) I feel as though I have accomplished that day.
I, unlike Paul, have not quite learned the art of being content in my weakness.
But He's working on it.
I'm realizing (slowly) that I don't want to be able to do it all on my own, even when I think I do. If I were somehow able to do it all on my own, I know that I would never stop to rely on Him. If I were somehow under the illusion that I had this whole thing figured out, I would be focused on all the wrong things.
Like myself, and my finite "awesomeness".
Rather than being focused on Him and His infinite awesomeness.
He never runs out of energy. His health never fails. He never has doubts. He never makes mistakes. He sees all things, knows all things, and can do all things.
When I focus on Him, and His greatness and limitlessness - I find myself becoming more grateful for my own limits and weaknesses.
When my focus shifts from what I am unable to do, to what He is able to do, my whole perspective changes.
I begin to feel grateful rather than frustrated.
To feel humble rather than proud.
Worshipful rather than entitled.
To be content in weakness…. I never would have thought.
But He did. :)